Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Wordless Wednesday - Out With The Old, In With The New... Year

Sunday, December 27, 2009

My First Clomid Cycle

This cycle was my first taking Clomid. Basically it's supposed to make my ovaries pay attention and produce good eggs. You know the kind of eggs that are healthy and just waiting for a sperm to fertilize them. Apparently my eggs needed a boost.

Clomid is to be taken on Cycle Day 3 - 7. For me that means that I had to take it while visiting my parents for the holidays. I will admit that I was quite nervous because I was worried about the potential side effects. I already get migraine headaches and so I was worried that I would have a headache the whole time I was away. Thankfully my head was spared!

But I didn't go side effect free. The first 2 days were a breeze and I was thinking "what's the big deal about Clomid?" Then the next day I had a hot flash, or two, maybe 3. Since it is late December I can live with the occasional hot flash. But I also experienced bloating. I was so bloated in the evenings I had one heck of a belly bump! It was really uncomfortable.

I'm now done my prescription. The RE had suggested that we do an IUI with this cycle as well. But with the holidays and all I thought it best to not this time. Besides, many people get pregnant while on Clomid alone. Maybe we can be as lucky. If not, we'll try an IUI next cycle.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

2009 Holiday Letter

Jem over at Ambivalent Womb inadvertently gave me a post idea. Yesterday she posted her thoughts on people sending out holiday photos of their kids. You know the ones, the card arrives, the photo falls out onto the table. You pick it up and it's only of the kids, no parents, and there's no note. Or you open up the card and a 2 page family newsletter falls out. It's filled with a moment by moment description of each of the children's accomplishments.

Well it's my turn! Why should the Fertiles have all the fun?

My 2009 Holiday Letter:

Dear Friends and Family,

What a year 2009 has been! I started each day by taking my temperature at 5:15 am. Nothing says "Good Morning" better than hearing your digital thermometer beep its cheery tone at you. Of course Hubby disagrees, but after nearly 2 years of charting my daily temperature he's gotten used to it.

It's been so fun to live our lives in 2 week increments. You know the ones I mean. 2 weeks to live a normal life, followed by 2 weeks to obsess over every twinge my body makes, only to start all over again! The emotional ups and downs are way more fun than any roller coaster (which I wouldn't go on anyway - depending on which 2 week period it is).

And the longer it takes us to have a child, the more money that us D.I.N.K.S. (double income no kids) can amass - as many of you have pointed out to us on numerous occasions. Of course you know that we go on vacations and buy nice things solely to remind you of our "childfree" status. Ha ha ha!

I'm sorry that we haven't spent much time with you all lately, it's just so hard to find the time to get together. You see we're pretty busy working full time, trying to fit in visits to the fertility clinic and the lab for bloodwork. Plus, peeing on sticks and reading the results takes up a lot of my spare time. And did you know that Fertility Friend has a database of thousands of charts that you can look at anytime?

2010 is sure to be a blast too! I'll be taking synthetic hormones to help my ovaries produce better eggs. And since I'll be starting those in the middle of a prairie winter it will help to save on the heating bill as I'm told to prepare for some wicked hot flashes! In a few more months, Hubby will get to inject me with even more hormones!

It's hard to believe that some couples don't do anything together it seems we're always doing things together, often every other day!

I wanted to send you a photo of our boys in their Santa hats, but only one would cooperate. You know how they are at that age. So here's a photo of our oldest. He was pouting and wouldn't look at the camera!

Have a very Happy Holidays!

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Starting to get nervous

panic button Pictures, Images and Photos

Yesterday's excitement has worn off. Now, I'm starting to get nervous about using medical assistance to get pregnant. I hope my family will understand if I'm a little more stressed than usual over the holidays.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Back From the RE With a Plan - Sort Of

We met with the RE again today to review the results from the tests that she had ordered the last time we were there. We already know my HSG results were good. But the other test results were a mystery. Here we go:

  • FSH levels: 3 - very good *
  • Ovarian ultrasound: 12 follicles - mostly small, 4 of decent quality
  • Semen Analysis: 57 million - lower than the last time but Hubby admitted that he didn't get it all in the cup. The Dr. said that this was still very good.
  • Estrogen levels: 414 - very elevated *
* So it seems that my estrogen is high. Unfortunately that can cause false readings of FSH meaning that my awesome level of 3 may not be as good as it seems. The RE has asked that I redo the FSH test again.

She said that other than the estrogen levels, everything looks normal. Our infertility is what the professionals call "unexplained".

We are not out of options. She suggested that we try using Clomid for a few cycles then try IUI (intra-uterine insemination - AKA artificial insemination).

But, we're in a pickle. I'm still in the midst of my longest cycle ever. I think that AF is due on Friday or Saturday. We leave for my Mom's house on Sunday. So there's no way that I will get my FSH test done this cycle (it has to be done on CD3). I have to decide if Xmas at my mom's is the best time for my first medicated cycle (I'm told that Clomid can make you a little crazy).

We made some decisions though. I did pick up my Rx for Clomid. I will have the option, or not, to take it next cycle. We can call the RE's office at the start of any cycle if we opt to do an IUI. And we put our names on the IVF list. Our IVF orientation is on Jan. 28th. There is a $250 registration fee for IVF. We figured that I've spent way more than that on OPKs, monitors, supplements, etc. The worst that could happen is we get pregnant before we start IVF. The best thing - we skip ahead in the line because we signed up early.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Sublime Sunday

I hate to break it to everyone but I feel that someone has to do it. Winter is officially here. In fact it's been here for a few weeks now. I know that the calendar says that it's still Fall, but the calendar is wrong!

The outside temperature is a balmy - 27C (-17F) plus windchill. It's also snowing - again.

Let me show you the progression of the seasons:

Here is our flower bed shortly after planting in June:

Oh look, it's starting to snow. How pretty!

Oh look - the flower bed is completely covered in snow. F*ck!

In fact, that photo was taken over a week ago - there's even more snow now. However, we don't have to leave the house today. So right now, we're both on the couch, in our PJs, under a blanket and cuddling one of the cats. Hubby picked up supplies yesterday so we wouldn't have to leave today.

And that is what makes this Sunday Sublime: no obligations.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

No Wordless Wednesday

You may have noticed that my post frequency is getting less and less, well, frequent. It's not that I don't want to post, but sometimes I just need a break from all things TTC.

I first started this blog when I first found out I was pregnant in March of 2008. Then I didn't write another post for months. Partly because I forgot the password, and partly because after my loss I couldn't bear to be near anything that reminded me of my pregnancy.

Lately I realized that I wasn't writing for me anymore. I was writing for you - my readers. There's nothing wrong with that - in fact I really appreciate each and every one of you and look forward to your comments and questions. But, when I stopped writing for me it stopped being fun and almost felt like another job. I don't think anyone wants that.

So for both of our sakes, I'm going to blog when I feel like it now. Maybe once the holiday stresses are over I'll feel more like blogging.

Thank you for your patience and understanding. Love you!!

Here's what I think of TTC (and holiday) stress:

Animated baby giving raspberry Pictures, Images and Photos

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Digging Out

Sorry I've been absent from the internet lately my dear readers. I'm not ignoring you honest. I just wasn't sure what to write about. I didn't want this blog to be a place where all I did was whine about how hard TTC is for me. But this is also an anonymous blog and I didn't want to blog about things that were too personal (mind you, what's more personal than talking about EWCM?).

The good news is that I have 3 posts that are half written just waiting for me to be inspired to finish writing and posting them.

The bad news is that we are all but snowed in with our first blizzard of the season. Which means that all I want to do is snuggle under a blanket on the couch with my kitties (and Hubby too) while watching movies. Blizzards aren't very motivating.

All in all I think that we only got about 15 - 20 cm of snow (~ 6 - 9 inches). But with the wind blowing it around there are some pretty high drifts. I also think that the City was caught off guard 'cause no one has seen a snow plow out on the roads yet. We've shoveled the walk and driveway at least 3 times already!

Enough snow already!

Here you can see my Buddha is buried up to her neck in snow!

The good news is that I may finally have ovulated! My seemingly never-ending cycle may now be winding down. I'm so glad that I was charting my temperature this cycle. If I hadn't been who knows what my mental state would have been like? Even though it looks like I have O'ed, we didn't time our BD'ing very well. So I don't think that this cycle will end up with a BFP. I'm okay with that. At least I know that a new cycle will be starting in a couple of weeks.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Wordless Wednesday - The Requisite Sunset Shot

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Am I Really A "Superior Scribbler"?

Thanks so much to PCOS Chick! Let's face it, infertility is a bitch and no one should have to go through it alone. Thanks to the internet I have made so many new friends who know exactly what I'm going through. Today PCOS Chick passed along this esteemed award along to me!

Here's the way it works:

• Each Superior Scribbler must in turn pass The Award on to 5 most-deserving Bloggy Friends.
• Each Superior Scribbler must link to the author & the name of the blog from whom he/she has received The Award.
• Each Superior Scribbler must display The Award on his/her blog, and link to
this post, which explains The Award.
• Each Blogger who wins The Superior Scribbler Award must visit
this post and add his/her name to the Mr. Linky List.
• Each Superior Scribbler must post these rules on his/her blo

Now I have to pass along this award to 5 other deserving bloggers (only 5?). This was hard, I read a lot of blogs on a variety of topics. So here goes - in no order:

My Chart

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