Thursday, September 2, 2010

Once An Infertile, Always An Infertile

This is the post where you all get to see what a small person I am. Earlier today I got an e-mail from a friend that I've known since high school. She announced that she's 20 weeks pregnant.

Of course this is good news, I know that this is good news. When isn't a baby good news? Instead I got sad and even a little angry.

You see this will be her 3rd child. Each of her children was conceived as an "oops", and each child has a different father. She didn't have to pay close to $10,000 just to get pregnant.

I've been together with Hubby since before she got pregnant with her first. We did the responsible thing and finished our schooling, got jobs, got married, and bought a house long before we ever started to TTC. And we tried (oh lord how we tried) to get pregnant. I'm not saying that we will be better parents or that we will have more love for our child than she will, but we certainly know which blessings to count.

I wonder if she were to tell me that she struggled to conceive this time if I would be happier for her?


Busted Kate said...

Hey preggo buddy!

Ok, I totally feel you on this. I still get mad about other people getting pregnant! Well, at least to the other people who had an oops. I keep joking that all I would have needed to do to get preggo 5 years ago would have been to become a drug addict! Start taking meth, lose my job, and get arrest... BAM I would have been knocked up in no time.

But at least we're here girl!

Sweet Georgia said...

I so know what you mean. Just because I'm pregnant, doesn't mean the infertile mindset is gone. I still think "must be nice" when I hear someone I know has gotten pg on their first try or by accident.

Michelle said...

Even though my situation would not be labelled as "infertile" I still know what you mean. I have a cousin who got out of jail in January - just in time to get pregnant and be due a few weeks before me. I have a hard time being happy for her and I feel like I will always have this naggy disdain for her. I feel very selfish saying this but it is probably mostly due to the fact that I had to endure so much to have this baby and no me and my baby will have to share everything (holidays, birthdays, etc) with this "oops". It makes me feel like I have been cheated yet one more time.

Anyway, enough rambling - HUGS to you. There are too many people who know exactly how you feel!

Seanaci said...

My heart aches for thos of you who have struggled (or continue to struggle) to get pregnant. I can't even imagine. So, I totally understand why you feel the way you feel. I'd probably feel the same way if I were in your shoes. Congrats on your healthy growing baby!! :)

My Chart

Related Posts with Thumbnails